The Harry Potter Alliance

By Amanda Bolton

December 17, 2009

Day 10 – Tips for School Stress

I used to be very much like Hermione when it came to school and stressing out about things. I would memorize everything to the letter and aim for 100%. I always worried I would do badly. If I did, then how would I get into university? get or keep scholarships? a job?

Now, after 24 years of going to school (K-12, then 11 years of university–yes 11!), I’m not like Hermione most of the time, and I want to share the tips I’ve learned along the way. Many of the tips everyone else is sharing apply, so I will focus on only school-specific stuff, but remember and use everyone else’s tips as well!

I have found that almost everything comes down to two big problems:

Issue #1 Time Management

Problem 1. You find yourself regularly turning down friends/family invitations because “I really should get some work done.” If this is the case, you aren’t valuing your friends and family enough and you aren’t using your time effectively. I’m guessing when you stay home to get that work done, if you are anything like me, nothing much actually gets done.

Problem 2. You planed to get a lot done last weekend, but other things kept interrupting. You never had a good stretch to just work on things.

Problem 3. Deadlines just keep coming! You have a huge paper due in two days and you haven’t even started. Now you have to rush to try and get everything done but there’s little time for planning or brainstorming.

Problem 4. You know it needs to get done, but you just can’t get yourself started on it. Yay for procrastination!

Solution: Make a schedule and stick to it! “When I have the time” is simply a myth–that time never comes, for getting work done or for visiting friends. You need to MAKE it.

Write down what you need to get done today/this week in detail (e.g., “make an outline for the English paper”, NOT a vague “work on English paper”) and schedule times to work on things. THEN STICK TO IT! …boy I wish I followed this advice. Make it a habit to work on things at certain times, just like a job, and pick something off the list. Even just a little bit of time every day will help you keep up with the work, reduce the stress from guilt of not getting things done, and free up time to go out with your friends. It adds up fast. And DON’T give this bit of time away to anyone else–no phone calls, no meetings, no TV, just you and your work.

Part of this is also being organized. Know what you need to do and when. This is more than just “the paper is due Nov. 24″ but when should you have the outline done? When should you have the background research collected? Set goals and deadlines for yourself. When things are made into little bits, it is easy to accomplish the little bits so the big huge thing doesn’t seem so big and huge. This is something Hermione and I did quite well and how she managed to do an insane amount of work and STILL have time to knit elf hats–but I procrastinated and didn’t have that extra time.

Now it’s all fine and dandy to say “keep a schedule” but doing it is another thing right? I know I’ve failed at taking my own advice. So here are more tips to help get it done: make a special area where you work. It does not have to be fancy, but it should be uncluttered and free of distractions and KEEP it clean–no mess is ever allowed to go there. Maybe have a special drink while you work, or quiet instrumental music in the background if that helps. Heck, toss on a witch’s hat if you like. Make a routine for yourself. Also, create rewards for when you meet your goals (but NOT the “reward” of taking time off working). And if you do fail one day, just get up and try again the next. Don’t let one slip (or a few) keep you from your goals.

Issue #2 Stressing too much over little things

Now this is where Hermione failed. She (and I) stressed out about EVERYTHING. But while I’ve had trouble keeping myself from procrastinating, I did manage to find a solution to this problem, and I’m much happier for it. Stress used to be a very big problem for me; so big, it ruined my health. It took years to recover from the physical and mental trauma I put myself through. During the time when I could barely do anything because I was so sick, I learned to start enjoying the little things in life: sunshine, a small breeze, the harmonies in a song. I learned that there is more to life than school, and that we control how we experience things. Things can be very stressful when you let them, but not that stressful if you don’t let them. Here are some specific things you can do to help:

1. The world will end if I don’t get a perfect score! …no, it won’t. Odds are, the worst that might happen if your score isn’t top notch it not that big a deal. We tend to stress a lot because we think things are more important than they really are. So ask yourself, what is really the worst, and is that actually so bad? And if by some crazy chance the worst does happen (but seriously, it is that likely?) what ways can you deal with it? Odds are there are many. Few things are truly a big deal when you stop to consider it; we blow them way out of proportion.

2. But I have so much work to do! …is there ever a time when that isn’t true? Most of us always have something we “should” be doing. Truth is, we can’t do everything, can’t work constantly, and need to take breaks. But we often fail at taking guilt free breaks so we don’t enjoy the break and end up even worse at getting stuff done. When you realize that there is more to life than your work, you’ll learn to put it aside and enjoy yourself more. It can wait. And if you plan a good schedule and follow it, you’ll know you are on track and you can plan to have nice breaks!

But if you are someone who gets a sort of thrill out of having a lot to do, instead of procrastinating or loading yourself up with too much work, challenge yourself to get it done in a short amount of time. Then you have the thrill of lots to do but you give yourself the time you need to live a healthy life.

3. But she/he/it/they really need help and I can’t say no! …it’s true we need to be a good friend and a good citizen. But sometimes we say yes when we shouldn’t. When you do that, you don’t help as much as you’d like and your own work suffers. So learn to say no. They can look elsewhere. If they end up truly stuck, then go ahead and help them, but limit yourself in how much you take on. Remember you need down time when you aren’t doing anything! No commitments, just whatever you feel like at the time. Same thing is true if you joined something to have fun but it’s turned into an irritating commitment; it’s probably time to leave.

4. Everything will be great once X/Y/Z is finished! …things might be a bit crazy right now, but things won’t be completely roses in the future, and once the future comes, months or even years of your life will be gone and you won’t get them back. We often focus too much on the ultimate goal and forget to live while on the journey. It’s fine to make some sacrifices to achieve something big, but you must always remember to share your life as you go with the people who are important to you. Don’t put off visiting with your friends and family for long periods of time or you will end up regretting it. There will never be an ideal time, we just imagine that there will be.

If you can learn to lessen procrastination, realize that we put way to much importance on some things, and recognize what your true priorities are, you can get lots done while keeping stress lower and your enjoyment of life higher. It takes practice and it can be difficult–no one will ever be perfect at it–but it is worth it.